Here is the transcript of Darrell Buxton’s introduction to the very funny Dude Bro Party Massacre III screening from Friday 29th January.
Dude Bro Party Massacre III
Hello again and welcome to our first Fright Club screening of 2016. New year, and brand new film, as tonight we’re screening the retro slasher spoof DUDE BRO PARTY MASSACRE III.
In 2005 the Cadillac motor company decided upon a new way to promote their successful line of vehicles, inviting filmmakers to devise and make car commercials for them. The stipulation was that these ads should be a mere five seconds in length. There are a few available to view on line; the couple I’ve seen are catchy micro-productions, one of which sets a frantic blur of speed to the riff of Led Zeppelin’s ‘Rock and Roll’, the second impressively achieving a mini remake of Danny Boyle’s TRAINSPOTTING.
A student at the University of Southern California, Brian Firenzi, became intrigued by the Cadillac ad campaign and the concept of reducing film to a bare bones flash of images. He got a bunch of friends together to attempt their own bit of rapid cinema, a short called CHIVALRY IS DEAD, also viewable on YouTube, a funny little drama in which a frizzy-haired dude in a cool t-shirt refuses to hold a door open for a woman.
Thus the moviemaking troupe ‘5 Second Films’, or 5SF for short, was thrust into the world. Since that first tiny step into shrunken entertainment, 5 Second Films haven’t looked back, as their cult and their internet presence has grown, building a following and even attracting the stellar names of American comedy, the likes of Patton Oswalt, Larry King, and Andrew WK into the fray. The 5 Second gang operated from a communal dwelling in Silver Lake, Los Angeles, perhaps a pleasant throwback to the Californian days of hippiedom and communal living helping to spawn interesting and original art.
In 2009 the 5 Second team uploaded DUDE BRO PARTY MASSACRE III, a quick blast of slasher horror in which a houseful of frat boys are interrupted, mid-pillow fight, by the appearance of a backlit, fog shrouded, apparently female figure. The flash of a gleaming knife, an anguished yelp of terror, and an announcer speedily informing us that this is a coming attractions teaser for “Ddbrptymsscr3”, rounds it all off in record time. In 2010 the team decided, shockingly, to expand beyond their self-imposed limits and give us more Dude Bro, with a whopping 88-seconds-long fake trailer for the film, the voiceover this time advising that “this Passover, they’re gonna need a miracle”, promising us “more exposed man tits than you can count”, and having a cop inform us “that’s the 19th murder call this night!”. Again, do check these out online when you get a couple of spare minutes.
The next step, inevitably, was a Kickstarter campaign to see if 5SF had sufficient support to make this into their first full length feature. Fans rallied round – the finished film’s end credits run for longer than usual for this kind of fare, out of necessity in order to gratefully cram in the names of their hundreds of financial donors – and over $240,000 was raised, meaning that DUDE BRO PARTY MASSACRE III could now come to fruition as a proper, actual film.
The official website is worth a look too. The front page contains a fake quote from legendary U.S. critic Leonard Maltin, allegedly assessing DUDE BRO III as “much worse than the first two!”. Even tonight’s screening at Derby QUAD got a special mention, on the site’s rolling list of theatrical bookings. and they are promising DUDE BRO merchandising very soon.
The film itself is a lot of fun, the concept being that it is a rare slasher sequel from the early 80s that was suppressed by none other than Ronald Reagan! All copies were supposedly destroyed, but a fan managed to tape a stray late-night cable TV screening on to VHS and preserve this masterpiece for future generations. Cleverly, therefore, we get lots of picture interference and video drop-out effects throughout; and, for anyone 5 Second purists disappointed that the guys may have sold out by producing a proper motion picture, you’ll still get your jollies here and there, as every time we come to an ad break we get a tantalising snippet of a spoof TV commercial, just before the person taping the broadcast presses their pause button to edit the recording.
During the original 1980s slasher boom following the surprise success of Fright Club faves HALLOWEEN and FRIDAY THE 13TH, it wasn’t long before a contemporary wave of horror spoofs emerged to sit alongside the real deal. Of course, some psycho films turned out to be so ridiculous and populated with such dumb characters that it was often difficult to tell the comedies and the genuine shockers apart! Last October’s instalment of QUAD’s annual ‘Dead and Breakfast’ all nighter included a vintage slice of hack and slash humour with Mickey Rose’s 1981 offering STUDENT BODIES, featuring ‘The Breather’, doing away with his victims via trash bag, blackboard eraser, horse-head bookends, and paper clip; other similar items from the period include HYSTERICAL, NATIONAL LAMPOON’S CLASS REUNION, PANDEMONIUM aka THURSDAY THE 12TH, and my personal favourite, WACKO, starring Joe Don Baker and featuring the infamous ‘Lawnmower Killer’.
So, DUDE BRO PARTY MASSACRE III here continues a healthy tradition of putting horror and humour hand in hand. Prepare for plenty of gags, admittedly hit-and-miss but so fast moving that there’s a high chuckle ratio; and the makers don’t stint on the blood and guts either. Enjoy it or else – Motherface is watching you…